The four types of Christians and the ONE you must avoid PT 4: THE PASTORPRENEURS

Napoleon Bonaparte, the French military and political leader who lived in the 18th century did not spare to note in his famous quote “I am surrounded by priests who repeat incessantly that their kingdom is not this world and yet they lay hands on everything they can get”. One can simply imagine that the practice of priestly gluttony did not begin in this age, and it is in fact an inherent character of the men in robes who mount religious altars to insatiably crave for the luxury of coins and the pockets of the simpleton.

The pastorpreneur is the man on the payroll of everyone’s pocket in the church. He is the reason why the churchgoer can’t put his mind off on “settling God”. He is the reason why the churchgoer will work twice harder in order to bring his proceeds to God of which the pastorpreneur is impersonating in practice. Men of God they call them, but Gods of men they are, for whatever they lay claim to the sheeple as the dictates of God, such declaration is certainly of God and the sheeple won’t and can’t question. When the churchgoer says he pays his tithe to God, they are the Gods in whose possession the tithe safely lies. Their pocket – the church’s offering, their bank account- the collective proceeds of men, and the minds of men- their football pitch. None other but these men solely control the mentality and minds of men en masse. The mentality of a religitard is determined by the oral blunder of his pastor.

They are like software developers, whose input determines the output and behavioral outcome of the religitard and churchgoers. Insult the religitard and every other thing, but say no word about his pastorpreneur; he’ll skin you alive. To the shepple, he is blameless. Even in his glaring blemish and corruption, they see nothing and hear no evil. True to this, the pastorpreneur lives as God; for who can blame God? The choir spinsters are for his delight, to do freely as he is pleased. Fishers of men like the holy book labels them, and true to the title, all he needs to do is simply point at the desired spinster(fish) and the kill is all to his indulgence in the bedroom. After all he who works in the altar, must eat from the altar. The pastorpreneur not only possesses the power to hack into the wallets and minds of men, he can equally hack in between the thighs of the religitard bandwagons on skirts. As a man, you just can’t help but envy the pastorpreneur; all he’s got to say is “Thus says the Lord sister Grace, ‘commit thy vessels of milk and flowery temple into the hands of the prophet, that he may come his bowels into thy wet abode”, and boom! He is laid. Call it the work of the PIMPINGSTRY, sorry, the work of the ministry.

Not only are the wallets and purse of gullible men not safe around these men, the thighs and breasts of maidens are not spared from their nets. Whether a bachelor or a married man, the pastorpreneur is a lustful man. It is said by the old quote that “power corrupts and absolute power corrupts absolutely”. The priest is one who wields some power over the minds of people under the sound of his voice and fellowship. He is one who is highly revered, wielding the age old primitive book tagged “holy” and above all unquestionably sacrosanct to dictate to people the affairs of their mind, what ought to be and not ought to be. He is regarded as the servant of God, the voice of God, one who knows the affairs and dictates of God more than the rest of the clan. As such his voice is that of God, his opinion is God’s and his demands are God’s. He is the voice of God and the “GOD of Voice”; the man whose voice supersedes every other voice in the mind of the religious. He is the man whom the people have appointed to deceive them, the man whom men have permitted to lie to them, extort them and determine to them what ought to be and not be.

More gullible and susceptible to their greed are the desperate single women in the church; the single sisters whose desire is to hear the one over-rated statement of two brief words “I DO”. In the Pentecostal churches where some preachers are referred to as “Prophets” or “Seers”; preachers who are believed to possess some special gifts to perform miracles and hear in real-time from God, these desperate singles are their favorite play toys and objects of quick extortion. Since the prophet is regarded as one who speaks with God in real-time and posses extra authority and power to do certain miracles like giving husbands, jobs, healing, wealth, etc.The contest to please this very pastorpreneur is trendy and politicking in the church. The coins and properties of men are his gifts without even calling. The stupidity of the ignoramus is his blessing no which he will ride happily on with a smile to the bank. Those who possess no cash to gain his favor that will draw his miraculous intervention into their predicament, they often opt to pay in kind either by being dedicated workers in the church, domestic helpers at the preacher’s house, not excluding the services of aiding the man in times of erection. When it comes to servicing the bedroom of the priest and attending to matters of his priestly erection, the gullible spinsters and female religitards are ones who happily tend to his libido. Like the religious always defend their gullibility and extortion by the preacher say “If I give the man of God, I am giving to God not a human being. Because the bible says “WHOEVER RECEIVES A PROPHET … SHALL RECEIVE A PROPHET’S REWARD…..” The acclaimed holy book says “FOR WHOEVER SHALL GIVE YOU A CUP OF WATER TO DRINK IN MY NAME ……. HE SHALL NOT LOOSE HIS REWARD”. As such, it should be defended that giving one’s vagina to the priest and tending to his thirst in erection or libido is “giving unto God” and not the preacher.

No other day of the week gives the preacher so much joy like Sundays. He is on his highest ebb on these days. You can never find an unhappy pastor on Sunday unless of course the turn-out in the Sunday service was disappointing or the church offering did not amount to what he had hoped for. Cetris paribus, the preacher is the happiest on Sundays. Standing tall and high on joy on the pulpit, the preacher is often the finest to sing the popular church song “I AM HAPPY WHEN THEY SAY LET US GO TO THE HOUSE OF THE LORD”. Every preacher is at orgasm when the lyric of this song from the psalms of David is played aloud. And the preacher never fails to echo “IN THE PRESENCE OF GOD, THERE IS FULLNESS OF JOY”. If you are the preacher, will you disagree? Standing shoulders-high like an alpha-male on the pulpit and over-looking his congregation, his sees the vibrating smile of his church members, the happiness and willingness by the sheeple to be fleeced by their shepherd. He sniffs the air and smells the gullibility of the people, he inhales deeply and drops a worship song that expresses his innate euphoria, and true to his vibe, the people about to make him richer join to echo his joy as he closes his eyes to picture his bank figures about to add some weight.

The preacher is a like a spoilt child and a baby that refuses to grow-up. He wants to be fed, he wants his needs to be everyone’s, and he wants his desire to be everyone’s burden. All he does is demand, ask, and beg, and above all, he demands like it is his right to be given. He wants a new car, the congregation must find a way to bring it to his garage. He builds a new home, the congregation must be involved. He gives nothing to people but wants everyone to give him everything. The only thing he gives to the people are adrenaline triggering rhetoric and sermons all tailored towards how they should give to his purse, which he’ll tag as “the church”. Give, give and give is what their mouth is dripping with.

Like a spoilt child and an ingrate, those who give the most to his coffers are his favorite, whom he appoints special sits and titles in the congregation. The men whose pockets leak the most into his coffers, their homes his feet shall find an unending tourism. Pitiable are those who have nothing to contribute to his bank account, for they do not exist. They are ones whom the axe of “church discipline” and discrimination hangs around. More pitiable is the man whose home the preacher’s feet knew but fate took away the one object which brought the preacher continually to his yard. Like a used snack, he shall be thrown into the dustbin of history.

Pastorpreneurs are among the worst ingrates ever. They dance around men who contribute copious sums to their “PIMPINGSTRY” and greet the meager members with a snob appeal. When the person who is in the habit of showering their coffers with money is ineffective or goes broke, they dump the individual and move on to another host. They are parasites, ingrates and con men. All they care about is their business and you just have to envy the way they call it: “the Work of God”, “ministry”, etc. They are in the business of competing against each other. Pastor A versus Pastor B; who has more sheeple, who is richer, who drives better cars, whose wife is prettier or more expensive. Their competition is even taken outside the church business to schools and private jets ownership. And the religitards are applauding to the rat race as their incomes are fueling the luxurious greed of the priests.

Priests are men of avarice on fraudulent robes saddling the minds of gullible men to the abattoir, slaughtering every piece of sense and reason in them and with no intention to spare any pint of rationality in their souls. They are the merchants of superstitions, marketers of fairy-tales and the parasites of the men’s coins. You need not wonder why the politicians are found with them. Be wary of them for they will take your money, rob your senses and drain every drop of rationality left in your soul and replace it with fear, bigotry, pious hope for superstitions and buffoonery. Your daughters are not safe with them; they will snoop into their panties. Your young boys will not be spared either. And their fiery lusty eyes will not be taken off from thy green fields. Look upon them like the fox; revere them like you would, the lion.

CULLED FROM “RELIGION: THE ULTIMATE CURSE ON MANKIND” by Imoh “Son Of David”

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