Is The Church Useful?

Once a time in a certain city or should I call it a town, in Nigeria…….

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There was high crime rate……………… The night was a feast for the sons of Dracula. Unlike their father who possessed skinny soul-searching fangs, these evil sons had on them dangerous metals with the talent of a catapult. Guns, is that what humans call it?

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They preyed on the peace of other men in the city. If you’re a woman, once the sun seem to be reading his handover note for the day, you begin looking up in the sky, praying, “may this not be the day the burglars will break into my wet vessels with their erect sticks of terror.”

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Due to the terror, everyone kept a date with their homes before 6PM. Adulterous husband repented. Who says thieves don’t win souls?
Well, not everybody respected the body language of the social Generals………. The church!
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Of course the pastor was more concerned about his greedy tray of God. And so churchgoers did their thing. “The earth is the Lord’s”, they proclaimed. And of course the Lord also said that “the young lion shall not be hungry.” Too unfair was the blessing of the lord that he never took to consideration that his “madtards” will be the food for the young lions.

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And so, “spiritual sister” Ekaette, Sister “tongue-speaking” Rita the ritard and Sister Blessing “I am Mary-incarnate” got raped so many times than the atheist can handle “Jesus is Coming Soon” poetry. But they kept going to church and the young lions kept eating.
“It is persecution, they said. “God is testing our faith” they posited. “It is the work of the Devil” explained the pulpit parrot. “Give more offerings and seeds for His protection”, he charged.
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Nobody asked why armed men keeps attacking them on their way to and fro church. Nobody asked why haven’t God answered our prayers and keeps allowing armed robbers rob and tape us. You know asking pertinent questions is a disability to the religious.
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Of course, in Nigeria, better be assured a Donald Trump sensibility than the intervention of the Nigerian police at a crime scene.

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Meanwhile, the churches refused to spare their worshipers the terror by calling quits with night activities. “We must worship our God” is the motto.

Those who stayed back home were preached at by the pastor that they are fake believers and of course hell awaits them for being sensible with their feet.

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To put an end to the social mess for all, the city’s government imposed a no movement time 7PM till 7AM. Everyone but the Church supported this. “This is end time!”, “The anti-christ is here”, “You are fighting the church”, “The governor must die for this” etc. We all know their usual line of uproar.

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Ladies and gentlemen, this is the so called Kingdom of God called the church. They consider themselves an assert to humanity. As we can see in the event above, they are truly an assert. No doubt. And I’m sure they must be so reasonable and useful to you, right?

By Imoh “Son of David”